Sci-Fi

Tits, Swords and High Adventure!

Kirk — Fri, 15 Aug 2008 15:40:38 -0400

There are many great things about Conan The Barbarian. Sadly, it's suit-up scene isn't one of them. What may, at first glance, seem to be a perfectly acceptable scene quickly becomes a disappointment upon further study.

Locker rooms, bad centerfolds, and the United States Colonial Marines!

Dennis — Tue, 26 Aug 2008 17:58:51 -0400

I think it's only fitting that my first review here be for my all-time favorite movie of all-time. (notice it's so badass that I even squeezed the words 'all-time' into that sentence twice!). Yes, ALIENS. I guess I''m not that unique. It seems every party I go to I meet at least one person who agrees with me. Mind you, not that I walk around interrupting conversations to interject and ask people what their favorite movie is. No, I have a form I hand out at the beginning of the party like a ballot. It's much more thorough and people have a tendency to be more honest.

Fight for Your Right to Hunt Crights!

Brian James — Thu, 16 Oct 2008 17:15:07 -0400

"Critters, Crights!"

This simple utterance from the Other Bounty Hunter (not Ug who takes the form of 80's rocker Johnny Steele but the one with an identity crisis that keeps shape shifting) sums up the spirit of this tepid suit-up scene.

Suiting-Up is Easier When You Have a Vagina in Your Chest

Ben — Sun, 26 Oct 2008 18:23:38 -0400

Think quickly. You’re just told that the torture porn that you enjoy watching (no, not Saw) gives you hallucinations. You’re informed, by the same person, that you’re being used in a plot to get rid of the scum that watch said torture porn. Coincidentally enough you own this television station. In order to take the trash out to the curb your television station will show the torture porn which gives people hallucinations to make them weak, thus making North America stronger in order to compete with the rest of the world.

"In 19 minutes this area's gonna be a cloud of vapor the size of Nebraska."

Dennis — Sat, 25 Oct 2008 13:10:14 -0400

*Disclaimer of Awesomeness: Not only does 'Aliens' have TWO suit-up scenes -- the locker room suit-up scene in the film was my first review here for the site -- it actually has two and a half. Shit, call it three! Three goddamn suit-up scenes in one movie! It's no wonder this is my favorite film of all time. So what is this double-banger suit-up scene I refer to?

When Ripley goes back for Newt, of course!

Deleting Fingerprints & Other Fantasies

Kirk — Wed, 03 Dec 2008 22:55:25 -0500

Will Smith is one of those actors that I really want to like. He seems like a nice enough guy, and he seems to be fortunate enough to make a lot of fun movies. However, he rarely makes a movie that I actually like. Some are terrible, most are mediocre and very few are good. Men In Black is one of the few that I think are good. Perhaps having a suit-up scene is what does it for me.

The Poor Man's Road Warrior

Dennis — Tue, 23 Dec 2008 15:33:59 -0500

I find myself in a tough predicament with 'Steel Dawn.' A conundrum really. Shit, maybe even a pickle. You see, I have not actually "watched" this film. I had to force myself to even stomach fast-forwarding through the damn thing. But I'm a huge Patrick Swayze fan. Let me repeat that for all you haters:

I'm a huge Patrick Swayze fan.